It’s hard to imagine the estranged relationship of twin sisters Ann Landers and Abigail Van Buren as they pursued nearly identical careers for decades, but they sure churned out some gems.

At every party there are two kinds of people – those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.
- Ann Landers

Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
- Ann Landers

I don’t believe that you have to be a cow to know what milk is.
- Ann Landers

If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you’ll be married to a man who cheats on his wife.
- Ann Landers

Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good.
- Ann Landers

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closes friends; if they seem OK, then you’re the one.
- Ann Landers

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim.
- Ann Landers

The Lord gave us two ends – one to sit on and the other to think with. Success depends on which one we use the most.
- Ann Landers ?