I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
- George Burns

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
- George Burns

I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
- George Burns

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
- George Burns

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
- George Burns