Mr T rarely gets acknowledged for his inspiring acts and words of wisdom. Let’s fix that. Today belongs to Mr. T, and I pity the fool that don’t agree. I mean, Mr T knocked out Rocky! Face it. The only reason he lost the final fight was because Sylvester Stallone wrote the script! Mr T was just doin’ his job. Which is why he said:

No, I don’t hate Balboa. I pity the fool.

He also said:

When I was growing up, my family was so poor we couldn’t afford to pay attention.

And he’s mindful of the importance of womanhood:

When you see me now, I’m nothing but a big overgrown tough mama’s boy. And I speak that with glee because the problem with society is we don’t have enough mama’s boys.

And makes astute social observations:

See, if I come into a black neighborhood and say, “Thanks for watching my show,” and give out high fives and all that, I’m not doing no good. I go out and see a kid grabbing his crotch. Ain’t nobody telling them that. Where do they get it from? They watch MTV. I say, “If you wash up more often, you won’t have to grab your crotch.” I’m telling these guys, “Why you gotta grab your crotch?” Then you see Michael Jackson grabbing his crotch 50 times. What’s with him?

And don’t forget, he beat cancer. How? He’s Mr T! And after he kicks its butt he says:

For 5 years Mr. T disappeared. Fools went unpitied and Jibba-Jabba went unchallenged!

And only Mr T could make a Snickers commercial that says:

Quit yo Jibber-jabber! You ain’t hurt, yo pathetic!, Argh! If I ever catch you acting like a crazy fool again, you’re gonna meet my friend pain! Snickers, get some nuts!